Often we forget, there was more going on in Mary’s life than just her pregnancy. There was also a guy she planned on spending the rest of her life with.
Although we have no recollection of the conversation that went on between Mary and Joseph on the day she told him she was going to have a baby, Matthew 1:19 does tell us a little bit about Joseph’s reaction:
“And Joseph, her husband, being a righteous man, and not wanting to disgrace her, desired to put her away secretly.”
Joseph knew he and Mary had never been together intimately (in fact he was not technically even her husband yet, but Jewish law stated betrothal was as legally binding as marriage although there had not yet been a consummation of the relationship at this point).
Therefore, Mary’s pregnancy was seen by Joseph—and all of those who would soon find out—as adultery, which at that time was punishable by death.
Imagine that, Mary turned to the man whom she had planned to spend the rest of her life with to tell him of the great blessing God was bestowing on her—and he wanted nothing to do with her.
Mary had to have known Joseph wouldn’t take the news too well—the whole thing sounded ridiculous. An angel appearing to a virgin and announcing she would become pregnant by the Holy Spirit would seem a little sketchy to someone who hadn’t brushed up on the Isaiah 7 prophecy (which actually foretells that the Messiah will be born of a virgin).
Think about how horrible that news must have seemed to Mary—here she was not even technically married yet, and she was going to be divorced (which was unheard of in those days).
She was going to be all alone—raising a baby—despised by her town, despised by her family and despised by Joseph. In that moment she probably could not have felt more unloved and shut out if she tried. She was facing ultimate rejection.
How many of us are firm in our convictions and are willing to hold fast to our beliefs—until some smooth talking, good looking, guy comes along? For many of us, the thought of being loved—or even liked—by an attractive and popular guy is enough to make us think twice about our convictions.
Some common excuses to wanting (and basking in) attention from a good looking guy who is bad news are, “Well, God is going to use me to lead this guy to Christ.” Or, “I’m just dating him, it’s not like we are getting married or anything.” The list could go on for miles, but it doesn’t change the facts—when the guy for you comes along you won’t have to make excuses or compromise your convictions—and Mary didn’t either.
Matthew 1:20-23 tells us God came to Joseph in a dream informing him Mary was not lying, and the child she was carrying was indeed from God. Verses 24 and 25 tell us he took Mary as his wife and kept her a virgin until Christ was born.
Notice Mary didn’t have to do any convincing. There was no, “But Joseph I’m the one for you—really,” coming out of Mary’s mouth. Had that story taken place today, I’m not so sure it would have turned out the same way.
I want to borrow a quote from Elisabeth Elliot when it comes to the guy issue (then we’ll get back to Mary’s story—I promise). In her best-selling book, Passion and Purity, Ms. Elliot says:
Women are always tempted to be initiators. We like to get things done. We want to talk about situations and feelings, get it all out in the open, deal with it. It appears to us that men often ignore and evade issues, sweep things under the rug, forget about them, go on with projects, business, pleasures, sports, eat a big steak, turn on the television, roll over, and go to sleep. Women respond to this tendency by insisting on confrontation, communication, showdown. If we can’t dragoon our men into that, we nag, we plead, we get attention by tears, silence or withholding warmth and intimacy. We have a large bag of tricks.
Although we cannot “listen in” on Mary’s conversation with Joseph, the outcome still teaches us two important things. First it teaches we should never let our convictions and decisions be guided by our attractions—if God is calling us to do something then we are to do it, even if it costs us the affections of a guy whether he is godly or not.
Second, we are not to try to “force” things when a certain guy does not seem to believe he fits into God’s plan for our lives—no matter what we think God has told us. We should never use a “thus saith the Lord” in an attempt to manipulate some guy into being a part of God’s plan for our lives. Like Mary, we need to leave that part up to God.
Let God fill the guy in on how he is (or isn’t) supposed to be part of your life.
Excerpt taken from God Called a Girl. To order a copy click here.
Tags: Christmas, crushes, God Called a Girl, Mary, nativity story
Great Blog Post…
Have a look at this Post on this Blog, really worthwile…
Shannon, this is simply awesome!