Archive for the ‘Prayer’ Category

Big Decisions, Not Enough Time

Tuesday, October 12th, 2010

Enjoying the sun

Rash decisions.

We’ve all made them at one point or another.

Lately, I’ve found myself busier than I’ve been in a long time with plenty of good things. When I get busy, though, I tend to turn on some internal form of autopilot that allows me to speed through my inbox, voicemail and in person interactions quickly responding to invitations.

“Yes, I can come to your party.”

“No, I’m sorry I can’t donate that many books right now.”

“I’ll consider writing that book proposal.”

“My calendar is slammed right now. Can we do coffee around Thanksgiving?”

But there have been other offers and opportunities that have come my way that have been far more difficult to wade through. They seem to have come with a disclaimer directly from God. Do not answer this one until I tell you to.

So emails have sat in my inbox, and messages have been left on my voicemail, that have gone unreturned for longer than etiquette would deem appropriate simply because I didn’t know what to say.

Certain decisions have required prayer. I don’t mean a quick cry for wisdom on my way out the door in the morning. But real, time set aside to get on my face, prayer.

It was through this series of sensitive requests that I realized my schedule hadn’t been built to allow time for such seeking. In the midst of my busyness I didn’t give myself any room to make big decisions. There wasn’t space on my calendar for longer prayer.

I was left unequipped to handle the situations unfolding before me because I hadn’t created enough space in my life to seek the One who had the answer. Sure, I was having a daily quiet time. I was spending my days writing and teaching about how to apply the Bible to real life.

But my life was strangely disconnected from the wisdom I needed to navigate the decisions ahead.

Some people call it margin. Others mark off space on their calendars and call it an appointment. I’m still not sure what I call it. But I know I need it.

Space. Time. Room to pray and seek and listen. More than a quiet time less than a retreat.

If I don’t find a way to build this into my life I run the risk of committing myself to things God never intended me to. I leave myself vulnerable to being duped by a good thing that could rob me from experiencing a great thing.

I could easily find myself trapped like Joshua and the Israelites were in Joshua 9 when they were busy sampling everything placed before them and forgot to inquire of the Lord before making a life altering decision.

So, this week, I will seek. I will pray. And only then will I give my answer.

What about you? How do you make big decisions? What are some ways you build space to seek the Lord into your daily life? Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you needed to give an answer but didn’t have one? How did things work out?

Lifting Up My Hands

Thursday, July 29th, 2010

She Speaks

…Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset. So Joshua overcame the Amalekite army with the sword. –Exodus 17:10-13

The thing that I love about the above passage is that Joshua wasn’t in the battle alone. Not only that, but Moses didn’t even have to hold up his hands by himself. There was one war being fought and each person had a role to play in it. When each person did his part the battle was won.

I’m heading into my own battle or sorts this week and I could use your prayers.

Today I’m getting on a plane and heading to the She Speaks conference. Those of you who read my blog regularly know that I write for the She Seeks division of Proverbs 31 Ministries and that I also attended this same conference last year. I love these women greatly and I think they put on one of the finest conferences there is when it comes to equipping women for writing, speaking and women’s ministry.

I have several friends I don’t see often that I will get to spend a few days connecting with. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t a part of me that’s desperately afraid to get on a plane, head all the way to the other side of the United States and do crazy things like participate in a speaker evaluation group where I will be critiqued so that I can better hone my speaking skills or sit down with a bestselling author for fifteen minutes and pick his brain on how I can better go about getting a new book contract.

This last week has been very difficult for me. As I prepared to teach at women’s Bible study at my church on Tuesday night and leave for this conference this morning I was met with opposition. First, I was plagued by the most intense bout with insecurity that I’ve experienced in years. There were voices screaming in the back of my mind that God was most certainly done with me and I should not be going to a conference full of experts and fresh talent.

Then the physical ailments started. A fever and headache came out of nowhere and sucked away my concentration as I tried my hardest to prepare to teach and speak. It was strange.

I spent a lot of this week on my face begging God for the strength to do what was before me and for the courage to walk in my calling.

That’s where you come into the story. I’m really hoping I won’t have to go to She Speaks alone. I’m asking you to go with me, to lift up my hands. If you feel so compelled, I’m asking you to storm the gates of heaven on my behalf from now through Sunday.

Some of the things you can pray for include:

▪Safe and on-time travels. I will be flying into thunderstorms and I have a tight connection that will barely get me to North Carolina on time to attend a dinner I need to be at on Thursday night. Please also pray my suitcase arrives safely with me.

▪Fresh vision and purpose about what God has for me in this season of life

▪Affirmation and confidence in my calling

▪New friends and strong ministry relationships that will be mutually encouraging

▪Bonding with my friends on the She Seeks team

▪A radical experience with God in the prayer room at the conference

Please know you will not waste a prayer on me. If you choose to pray for me this weekend I would love to know about it so I can personally thank you. So please leave a comment below.

I promise a full update after I get home from the conference. Thank you for your prayers and your support. I really couldn’t do what I do without you—and honestly, I wouldn’t want to either :)

Please also feel free to let me know how I can be praying for you.

While You Wait for Your Future Husband

Friday, January 22nd, 2010

Blog Post Wedding

Tomorrow my husband is in a wedding for one of his best buddies. Today we’re headed off to the rehearsal and a weekend full of celebrating with an awesome and godly couple. As I was shopping for a gift, getting my husband fitted for his tux and figuring out what I was going to wear, I thought about those of you who write to me all the time dreaming of your own weddings—and more importantly, your future husbands.

So, in honor of this wedding weekend I want to offer you some practical advice while you wait for your future husband. These words first appeared in my book The Divine Dance (which I wrote when I was still single):

God’s will is not always immediately discernable. You will probably meet and interact with several guys before you find “the one.” Mr. Right doesn’t usually come into your life accompanied by soft music and a cherub with a bow and arrow. So do yourself a favor as you wait for his arrival.

Make a list. Not a complicated list, but a specific one. Write down five or ten absolutely nonnegotiable characteristics that your future husband must have. Then write down five things that are absolutely nonnegotiable that your future husband cannot have. Prayerfully consider the items you write down, and then pray those things for your husband whenever you think of him. Each time some guy waltzes into your life, pull out your list and see how he measures up. 

Be honest with yourself, and you will save yourself a lot of heartache. Try to make your list one full of character traits. . Remember, what he wins you with he will have to keep you with and looks change over time. Add things like, “Must be able to make me laugh” and “Must not have violent bouts with anger.”  Make sure that any guy you date will hold you to an even higher level of purity than you would want to pursue for yourself…

Whether you are tangoing today or waiting for tomorrow, keep this in mind: God desires what’s best for you. He wants to give you a relationship that will model His love for you in earthly form. He did not spare His Son Jesus the first time around; I don’t think He’ll short you this time, either. 

A good dancer knows that in any performance, no move is as powerful as the pause. So if you feel like you are in between woman and child, single and in love, then practice patience and become a godly woman as you learn the art of the divine pause. 

Mary’s Song

Wednesday, December 16th, 2009

Praying

When I was in high school, my youth group hosted monthly nights of worship and communion in students’ homes. For awhile we met at mine. On a certain date each month my living room would be packed with forty or so high schoolers crammed into the small space like a bunch of sardines.  

People sat elbow to elbow and knee to knee, but when the music started no one seemed to notice. The entire room was engulfed in worship. We were lost in the lyrics and basking in the presence of God.

I can’t remember when these nights of worship stopped exactly, but somewhere along the way they got lost in the shuffle of school, work and hanging out.

Somewhere along the line life just got too busy and something had to go.  For some reason I was under the impression worship is something you do when you have time. Mary’s story is enough to show me I was wrong. 

As my friends and I used to cram into my living room and sing our hearts out to God, Mary sang her heart out to Him as well. Only hers was a unique and original song. 

“The Magnificat” as it is called (taken from the Latin word magnifies), consists of a handful of verses in Luke 1:46-55—and it tells us more about Mary’s life and heart than the rest of her story combined. Let’s take a look at it:

My soul exalts the Lord and my spirit has rejoiced in God my Savior. 

For He has had regard for the humble state of His bondslave;

For behold, from this time on all generations will count me blessed. 

For the Mighty One has done great things for me; and holy is His name. 

And His mercy is upon generation after generation toward those who fear Him.

He has done mighty deeds with His arm;

He has scattered those who were proud in the thoughts of their heart.

He has brought down rulers from their thrones,

And has exalted those who were humble. 

He has filled the hungry with good things; and sent away the rich empty-handed.  He has given help to Israel His servant, in remembrance of His mercy, as He Spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and his offspring forever. 

Mary was most likely illiterate, which to me makes her song truly amazing. There is so much packed into those few verses it is almost unbelievable. In this song Mary shows extensive knowledge of the Scriptures.

But what impresses me most is this girl—who scholars say could not read and did not have her own Bible—quoted portions of passages from Old Testament prophecies in Isaiah and referenced specifics of the covenant made to Abraham back in Genesis.

If Mary could not read, how on earth could she know these things? I’ve read them and they are not even that fresh in my own mind.

Think about this for a second, in order to know these Old Testament prophecies—and in order to have created this song—Mary had to pay attention intensely during her weekly visits to the synagogue because unless her father read the Scriptures to her during the week, the Sabbath would be her only exposure to them.

Imagine that—she had to memorize God’s Word by listening to it. That’s amazing. When was the last time you listened that closely in church?   

Mary’s story proves worship is not something that happens when you have time for it; it’s something that happens when you make time for it. The result is a natural outpouring of praise resulting from time spent with Jesus. Mary lived a life of undivided worship to God. Can we say the same about our lives today? When was the last time you praised God just because He is God?

In Psalm 86:11 the psalmist cries out, “Give me an undivided heart.” When was the last time you prayed a prayer like that and meant it?

The Magnificat was Mary’s way of praising God for what He was doing in her life—He was bringing the Messiah to the world, and He was using Mary to do it. How are you praising God for what He is doing in your life right now? Are you leaving behind a legacy of praise like Mary did? 

Excerpt taken from God Called a Girl. To order a copy click here.

Compassion in a Time of Need

Friday, October 2nd, 2009

African sportImagine if you lost everything you had over night. Intense rains came pouring down washing away every possession you owned, taking your dreams—and maybe even some of your loved ones—with it.

About a month ago that became a reality for many of the people in Burkina Faso (West Africa). Issouf, my sponsor child I told you about on Monday, and his family live there. Although I’m not sure about the status of their frail home, I do know that 150,000 people who lived in extreme poverty to begin with have now lost everything they own.

Fifty-six Compassion centers have been affected. The damage is currently being assessed and Compassion is working hard to meet the needs of those impacted by the floods.

Perhaps your heart was stirred as you read my posts this week about Issouf and Robert, but you aren’t in a position where you feel you can take on the monthly commitment of sponsoring a child or a Leadership Development student.

This is your chance to help. Compassion is now accepting one-time gifts to help meet the needs of those who have been affected by this severe flooding. A single gift of $30 will help one family receive food, emergency supplies and clean water for two weeks.

Moments like this are opportunities to be the hands and feet of Jesus to people who need it most. In Matthew 10:42 Jesus says that those who give even a cup of cold water in His name will rewarded in heaven.

Will you consider giving what you can—even if it’s not a full $30—to help the people of Burkina Faso overcome this devastation? Issouf and many others like him will be grateful for your generosity. Please also join me in praying for the protection and provision of the people in Burkina Faso.

If you have given to Compassion in any way this week as a result of reading this blog series I would love to hear about it—and I would love to send you a thank you gift. Please email me and let me know how God moved in your heart and how you stepped out in faith as a result. Thank you on behalf of the world’s poorest children for your generosity. Your reward in heaven will be great.

“God Doesn’t Answer My Prayers”

Wednesday, September 16th, 2009

womaninprayer

Have you talked to someone and noticed they weren’t listening? I hate that—especially when what I am saying is important. Nothing makes you feel worse than the indication that your cares are not significant.

Sometimes we feel that way about God. Recently I’ve received a handful of emails or Facebook messages from those of you who feel like your prayers are bouncing off the walls of heaven. God doesn’t listen, you think. God doesn’t care. Then you begin to wonder if He’s even real.

I’ve had my own unanswered prayers. Some I’m grateful for—like the fact I didn’t marry the guy I had a crush on when I was fifteen. Others still break my heart—like the time God didn’t heal my grandpa when he was dying.

In the emails I receive from girls I’ve noticed a pattern. Many of you pull out a verse and use it like a trump card. Jesus says in Matthew 18:19, “Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.”

Then you cross your arms in defiance and say, “I had all of my friends praying with me about this and God didn’t answer. So He must not be real.”

Now, what you are trying to do here is good. You are looking in the Bible to see what God says He will do and you’re holding Him to it (just like we talked about on Monday). Great. But there is a problem.

In most books of the Bible (Proverbs excluded) you cannot just pick one verse without consulting the verses around it and assume you know what it means. Context is everything—it’s true in all written correspondence and even in our speech. I once had a girl write to me to say my book Being a Girl Who Loves inspired her to stay in an abusive relationship because it would give her an opportunity to be more loving.

When I read that I couldn’t respond fast enough to tell her that was not the best conclusion to draw. I then encouraged her to love the person by leaving him and reporting him so he could get help. Imagine if she never wrote to me and kept getting beat up thinking it was what Jesus wanted her to do! The thought makes me sick.

We always need to read in context. Matthew 18:19 is couched between verses on church discipline and how the leadership should handle a member of the church living in habitual sin. They need to pray and come to an agreement on how to proceed. As they do God will be with them and do as they ask.

Unfortunately that verse isn’t a free pass to ask for anything we want and get it. If it was there would be far more millionaires and no more starving people. People would probably never die either. A world where everyone could pray for whatever they wanted and get it would be impossible too since someone’s prayers would most likely contradict someone else’s.

So you can’t call God a liar or non-existent because He doesn’t answer every prayer the way you want Him too. But you should still pray. Why? God invites us to.

Philippians 4:6 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.”

What’s the point?

Oswald Chambers says it best: “Our ordinary views of prayer are not found in the New Testament. We look upon prayer as a means for getting something for ourselves; the Bible’s idea of prayer is that we may get to know God Himself.”

Get to know God. Pray. And trust Him to answer in the best way possible.

She Speaks Lesson #3: Meeting God

Friday, August 14th, 2009

womaninprayerMy absolute favorite thing about the She Speaks conference was how God met me there. Since each of our relationships with God is such a personal thing, I’m not sure if anyone else will ever be able to fully understand how God met me in North Carolina.

But He did—over and over again. While at the conference I was exposed to some excellent teaching that will yield much professional and spiritual growth for me as I seek to apply it. But the thing that took my breath away wasn’t the teaching. It was the prayer room.

Proverbs 31 Ministries, the organization that puts the She Speaks conference on, is composed of some of the godliest women out there. When someone signs up for the conference they begin praying for her by name immediately. In the week leading up to the conference each woman’s name is printed on a strip of paper and once the staff gets to the hotel they take those strips of paper into the prayer room.

Throughout the prayer room the names of God, and verses explaining each name, are laid out on large sheets of paper. The names of the women are prayed over and then spread out across the names of God. Their prayer is that each woman’s name would be divinely placed on the name of God that best correlates with what she needs Him to be in this season of her life. Some of the stories women were telling about where their name was placed gave me chill bumps.

After a particularly moving time in worship on Saturday night I decided I was ready to meet with God in the prayer room. I recently finished Beth Moore’s Stepping Up Bible study and she taught us the discipline of praying on our faces. So, I ventured into the prayer room because I wanted to get facedown before the God of the universe.

But before I got on my face, I walked around looking for my name. When I saw it I began frantically looking around for a pen. I needed to capture every word and Scripture reference from that piece of paper because the prayers of the Proverbs 31 team had been answered. My name was placed just where it needed to be.

There in that prayer room God confirmed some things that He had been speaking to my heart all weekend. Things that only He and I knew. I. was. undone. And I was able to get on my face before Him in honest surrender and fully submit myself to whatever He had next.

This post isn’t long enough to explain the background information that makes my name being placed on that particular name of God so significant. And, in all honesty, right now it’s still something I would like to keep private between God and me. The story will come in time. Those of you who read this blog regularly will probably be among the first to see it. But, right now what name of God I most associate with isn’t important. The more pertinent question is which of His names most speaks to you.

When was the last time you studied the names of God? Pull out your Bible right now and use your concordance to help you locate some of His names that you may have forgotten about or might not even be aware of. During this season of life, what name of God best represents what you need Him to be for you?

Praying for Your Future Husband While You Wait For Him

Friday, July 31st, 2009

Praying

Sometimes it can be so frustrating to watch all of your friends pairing off and getting boyfriends—especially when a school dance or other big event comes along.

Even though the man who will one day sweep you off your feet isn’t in your life today, it is important to remember that he is out there somewhere and you can be praying for him. The odds are in your favor, most people aren’t called to celibacy. Chances are you probably will get married even if it takes awhile.

 The years spent waiting for your future husband don’t have to be wasted. On Wednesday we talked about how those years can be put to good use. But there’s another thing I want to mention before the week is out.

Every day you spend waiting is a day you can spend praying. I seriously began praying for the man I would marry when I was in college. Maybe it was the swarm of unattractive and immature guys around me that prompted me to pray for the man I would call mine. But I think it was something more than that.

I regularly prayed that the man God would have for me would have certain character qualities—patience, kindness, gentleness, godliness, etc…And I also prayed for his purity and that the Lord would be drawing him into a deeper relationship with Himself.

But there’s a period of months that still stands out distinctly in my mind. During that time I was prompted to pray that God would show my future husband that the relationship he was in was harmful and destructive. I wrote out a series of prayers in my journal asking God to give this man—whom I didn’t know—strength and resolve to end the relationship. I felt so strongly that this is what I should be praying that I prayed these prayers every night—and I wrote about them and dated them in my journal.

Years later when I began dating my husband the topic of past relationships came up. He only had one—during that very same period of months. It was destructive and he ended the relationship right around the time my burden to pray those prayers stopped. (My old journals serve as a written testimony in case there are any skeptics out there.)

I will never forget the look of amazement on Michael’s face when I told him about my old journals and those prayers. He was stunned and overcome with emotion all at the same time. The fact that God could be prompting my heart to pray about specific circumstances in his life when I didn’t even know him was truly an amazing thing.

So, take some time (it doesn’t have to be every day) and pray for your future husband. Ask God to build traits of godliness in him and make him a strong leader. Pray that God will give him boldness—especially when it comes to pursuing you when the time is right. Don’t be afraid to pray for his sexual purity and protection even from pure relationships with the wrong girls.

You may be amazed at what God will do. Keep a written record of your prayers with a date next to them so that someday you can have a written testimony of what God did in your love story long before you even knew the man you would marry.

What are some things you can (or do) pray for your future husband? Do you do anything special like keep a journal of letters to him? What are some ways you can take your longing for a relationship and turn it into something productive?